Indiscretions Are Easy To Forgive But Hard To Forget

Book 106 -

Romans 12:2 - 2. And be not confirmed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that we may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect will of GOD.

Ephesians 4:31 - 32 - 31. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice. 32. And be ye kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as GOD for Christ sake hath forgiven you.

I just had a unkindly thought that would make any one's stomach turn to the point of no return, if...thoughts were made of steal, I would have a "hard" time thinking twice of what I'm about to say. I had a thought about an ex cousin of mine, and I remembered something she did that made me feel really bad. I didn't want to bring up old rubbish and relex in the same breath, but...this need to come out on Author: Terri Celestine Brunson so that I can feel better about myself and be understood at the same time. I was with my sister at my sister-in-law Neyome's home; this thought I had was when I asked my ex cousin (of whom I will keep anonymous) for a appointment to cut my hair down a little at the top and back. She wouldn't accept the appointment, because she made all kinds of excuses of why she could keep my appointment.

I began to think, "Was it because she didn't have time to cut my hair, or she didn't want to do it at all?" I had my thoughts and questions to match about what I was thinking when my sister and I was turned down by our own cousin. It seemed that every time I asked her for an appointment, she either say, "Oh...I don't have time, or I can't do it." It seemed odd that my ex cousin had an excuse for every time I  scheduled an appointment for my hair, she 'flat out' turn me down. She never turned down anyone else down, but...my sister and myself.

I thought, "What did my sister and I do to our ex cousin for her not to give us a cut, or a style?" I truly believe that she fell 'out of tune' with us mentally, emotionally and completely. Like she was too good to put her hands into our hair. Only a person with common sense would think otherwise. I guess my sister and I had more common sense to notice that our ex cousin and the rest of our extended family did not want anything else to do with us if we weren't made of money, or had hair that was worth styling.

"Living like The Joneses" I would call it. No time, no acknowledgement, and no money (in which we didn't have) for them to even give my sister and I and my immediate family circle the time of day to know, or see if we were even part of their equation. I don't know why she acted the way she did, but...I know that when it comes to peeping over the horizon, I say, "Forget what was once was and focus on what's in front of me which is family." What was once was, is now a part of my past. I don't think I'll ever give my ex cousin the time of day ever again.

It was just a thought I had. I had to write it in my post so that I can feel better about myself, because my immediate family has been hurt so much by my extended family to the point that we want nothing to do with them. Either one of them! I can say that I can live without them and wouldn't think twice if they existed. I don't think it's all bad to not want someone there in your life if they don't appreciate you. I choose not to include my ex cousin, or the rest of the extended family in my equation, or in my thoughts.

I forgive all those who hurt my immediate family circle, but...I want forget their indescretions.