Never A Day Missed I Don't Think About My M O T H E R

 Book 198

Exodus 20:12 -12.Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

What I share with ever one of my family members is the memories of a legend. "A Legend Of Love" my M O T H E R Ruth Ann Brunson. There is not a day I don't think about my M O T H E R. She is kind of tough to get over with every ounce in my body I can take. She was the light that shined bright in our hearts, and I will never forget the memories she left behind for us to cherish.

She was a soldier in the army of GOD and his son JESUS. All the battles my M O T H E R when through, my pilots fought them all for her so that she could have peace with in her heart, mind, and soul. She also stayed silent about the things that hindered her, but she didn't let foolish things get to her, no matter what the happened or who did it to her. My M O T H E R was a pro at letting things go without hate or haste. She prayed and prayed unconditionally to GOD and his son JESUS about the burdens that was instilled on her at that brief moment in her life. A soldier of our pilots above!

My Mother was a "Legend Of Love" and you can never get no better than that in a lifetime if you give your love unconditionally; even weathering the storm that blow you around like a piece of cardboard. My M O T H E R been through every possible storm there is to go through. 35 plus years was enough for my M O T H E R. "It was enough for her!" She can now rest in the glory of GOD and his son JESUS. I am thankful for that!

When You Know You're Talked About

 Book 197

Acts 26:31 - 31. And when they were gone aside, they talked between themselves, saying, This man doeth nothing worthy of death, or of bonds.

Mark 3:5 -  5. And when he looked round about them with anger, being grieved for the hardness of their hearts, he saith unto the man, Stretch forth thine hand. And he stretched it out: and his hand was restored whole as the other.

Romans 10:3 - 3. For they being ignorant pf GOD's righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness., have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of  GOD.

Romans 3:23 - 23. For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of GOD.

No one can put nothing pass me If I know I'm being talked about. I am there in my head! But...you know what, "Sticks and stones, might break my bones, but...names will never hurt me in a flash." And...I do mean that from the heart. I do know that there is "one culprit" who's fueling it all to get everyone against me. I wasn't born yesterday, or the day after that. I am passed it with the abundance of common sense, and no one will take that away from me.

I gained that common sense from GOD and his son JESUS to know, and to see between every line that is shared and posted about me on social sites. "I'm not stupid by a long shot!" I know what I see without hearing about it word of mouth, and I am also tired of my M O T H E R S name used as a cop-out from their indiscretions. I am done with the people who are being stupid about things that don't make no sense when I'm not doing anything to them. Their indiscretions will send them to "Hell" if they don't stop doing what their doing. And...to say this, "The one culprit who is fueling the indiscretion, will send their offspring to Hell as well, if they don't stop using what was told to them against me."

This is why I let God and his son JESUS have it, because...I don't have time for nonsense, and people like the culprit, and the offspring to bring me down, and using my M O T H E R...once again as a cop-out. But let me tell about the offspring. The offspring acts as though it hurts to say, "Hello, or talk to about anything they want to talk to me about it." That's not right! To the culprit who is fueling these indiscretions to the offspring, "Woe beyond to them with a passion, if they're feeding the offspring indiscretions that makes no sense to place on their table, because...it's not only hurting them, but...it's hurting the offspring in this fiasco that will send both of them to Hell."

This is why I am telling it straight from my heart, because...I am tired of the offspring treating me like I am poison, and I am not there in presents in their eyes. I am tired of being ignored in the heart of the offspring. "I am also tired of the eye rolls too!" I am tired of the culprit using my M O T H E R as a cop-out for every sentence from their mouth every time I look around. 

A Real Family Coffee Cup Discussion

 Book 189

Luke 12:51 - 53 -  51. Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay, but rather division. 52. For from henceforth there shall be five in one house divided, three against two, and two against three. 53. The father shall be divided against the son, and the son against the father; the mother against the daughter, and the daughter against the mother; the mother in law against her daughter in law, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. 

When you deal with the deception of certain family members, your whole gets turned upside down and inside out without a care in the world. My immediate family found that fate after the death of my F A T H E R. When it came to my M O T H E R, I know what deception was when she died and hardly no one from my extended family bothered to show up at her funeral. If ever a time when I needed to have real family members there, I would of been totally accommodated. What was left of my immediate family was my sister, my brother, and myself.

Hardly no one from our extended family gave my sister Sherri, my brother Wesley, and myself the courtesy to even show us some kind of sympathy to at least show up at our M O T H E R S funeral. "What was up with that?" Love for my sister, brother, and I was just a mystery in a maze that I didn't want to find my way through. Every door I came up to...was a door of uncertainty on the other the other side of it. There was no love for my M O T H E R Ruth, even with her death.

The full emptiness of the short presents of people at my M O T H E R S funeral, showed me how important Sherri, Wesley, and I really were to our extended family. We thank GOD and his son JESUS for the few extended family and friends we did have at our M O T H E R S graveside service. It goes to show who "family" really is. No coffee cup discussions necessary for those extended family members who didn't even bother to show up at my M O T H E R S funeral.

With this said, no coffee cup discussion is worth the hassle when you have people (extended family members) who really love you. That's fine if my M O T H E R S graveside service did have many people to come and pay their last respects to her. Our memories will always extend from the sky to the horizon for my M O T H E R. So "Rest up ole girl" because we love you forever and always. 

The Wisdom Of Zachary

 Book 187 - Special Edition Post From Zachary To Me

Job 28:12-28 - 12. But where shall wisdom be found/? And where is the place of understanding? 13, Man knoweth not the price thereof; neither is it found in the land of the living. 14, The depth saith, it is not in me; and the sea saith, it is not with me. 15. It cannot be gotten for gold, neither shall silver be weighted for thereof. 16. It cannot be valued with the gold of Ophir, with the precious onyx, or the sapphire. 17. The gold and the crystal cannot equal it. and the exchange of it shall not be for jewels of the gold. 18. No mention shall b made of coral, or of pearls for the price of wisdom is above rubies. 19. The topaz of Ethiopia shall not equal it, neither shall it be valued with pure gold. 20. Whence then cometh wisdom? And where is the place of understanding? 21. Seeing it is hid from the eyes of all living, and kept close from the fowls of the air. 22. Destruction and death say, we have heard the fame thereof with our ears. 23. GOD understandeth the way thereof, and he knoweth the place thereof. 24. For he looketh to the ends of the earth, and seeth under the whole heaven. 25. To make the weight for the winds, and he weigheth the waters by measure. 26. When he made a decree for the rain, and a way for the lighting of the thunder. 27. Then did he see it, and declare it, he prepared it, yea, and searched it out. 28. And unto man he said, Behold, the fear of the LORD, that is wisdom, and to depart from evil is understanding.

 

I never thought I will hear wisdom by its character until I heard it from my son Zachary on this day April 3, 2021. I was having a terrible and an extreme bad patch about my M O T H E R. I was in shambles, not knowing what I was going to do without my M O T H E R in my presents. I cried out to my M O T H E R in a hurtful and painful cry, because I miss her so much. How my son's wisdom to acknowledge what he addressed to me started when my twin sister Sherri had told me what I had not expected her to say. 

She told me of the times our M O T H E R would just lay on her, not knowing that she was sick and fatigued from being sick, kind of struck a nerve in me almost immediately thinking that she was just fatigue, when in fact she was really sick. I cried for a brief moment thinking about the time our M O T H E R had also layed on my shoulder not knowing she was sick. It took all the strength out of me at that particular moment. I could not do anything else. I was stuck in that moment of grief knowing what I didn't know that my M O T H E R had suffered a sickness beyond the fact of her diabetes, her renal failure, and other things that was going on with her. 

I told my sister that I had to leave, because...I did not want to cry in front of her. I got up after Zachary had left out of my brother-in-law's mother's house to join him out in our car. I started to cried out for my M O T H E R in a rage, not out of anger, but...with a strong hurt in my heart, because of the thought of my M O T H E R laying on my shoulder, because...she was in fact sick, and that I miss my her so much knowing what I know now. Then all of a sudden...wisdom showed its face in a heartbeat through my son Zachary. What he said to me left me to only think twice about my grief for my M O T H E R. Here is what he told me! He told me this: "Mom...your M O T H E R is not hurting anymore and that she's not at the end of the road in just a grave, but...she is in the present of GOD and his son JESUS. My grandmother isn't hurting anymore. She would not want you to be grieving for her. She want you to celebrate her life as she lived it. Your M O T H E R had a mission on this earth like the rest of us. Her mission to live for the LORD is done and she was called home to GOD and his son JESUS. We too are not here for the long hall, we are here until our number is called. We are not here to stay." I was totally in shock of how much Zachary paid attention to thing I didn't know he was paying attention to.

Zachary gave me an ear full and then some about life. This 14 year old so full of wisdom to tell me what he told me is totally phenomenal. "I have a gift in Zachary!" A kid with Autism. I am never going to forget the awesomeness of his wisdom to me. 

I stopped crying immediately, and celebrated my M O T H E R S life when she was on this earth. It was like a reality check that my son had given me to think about. I will never doubt my son about what he knows about Christ our LORD, and his father, GOD. Zachary gave me an ear full and then some. All I could do is smile and accept what my 14 year old son had told me was nothing but the truth. 

I am never going to forget how wisdom got the best of my son in a awesome was to acknowledge. I am in celebration of my M O T H E R S life, even though...there will be some days that I will in fact cry out for my M O T H E R. And when I do, I am going think about the wise wisdom my son Zachary shared with me. It's a reality check from son to think about. I am very proud of him!

Fight My Battles For My F A T H E R Like A Toy Soldier

 Book 186 - Special Edition Post

1 Samuel 8:20 - 20. That we may be like all nations; and that our king may judge us, and go out before us, and fight our battles. 

2 Chronicles 32:8 - 8. With him is an arm of flesh, but with us is LORD our GOD to help us, and to fight our battles. And the people rested themselves upon the words of Hezekiah king of Judah.

Isaiah 30:32 - 32. And in every place where the grounded staff shall pass, which the Lord shall lay upon him, it shall be with targets and harps: and in battles of shaking will he fight with it. 

Step by Step, Heart to Heart...left right left, we all fall down, like Toy Soldiers. Whenever I hear that song, I think of my F A T H E R mostly, because...the woman who sung that song, lost her F A T H E R. It's very hard to fathom sometimes, because he is no longer here in my life, but...he will always be a part of the memories I have of him. "I will always treasure that unconditionally." I am hanging in there with every ounce of strength I have with every breath I take step by step, heart to heart for my F A T H E R. 

Left right left, I will not fall down in despair, grieve, and unhappiness like a Toy Soldier in this battle fought so hard through the last six months of my F A T H E R. "Who else can endure the kind of pain my family and I went through in one battle fought?" GOD and his son JESUS strengthen me and brighten me in my mind with all the tools I needed to win that battle for my F A T H E R in my pilots name sake. GOD and his son JESUS gave me the courage, the wisdom, and the talent to document without saying a word. The Toy Solider was left standing throughout everything it been through and won with an ounce of victory. With 427 battles fought, I was determined I give those battles to GOD and his son JESUS for my F A T H E R. 

Rest assure...my F A T H E R S story will continue to be true and told. There is justice for that solider known as my F A T H E R who has fallen, not by the wayside, but...in spirit so that he can rest in peace. I also think about my M O T H E R in the same way, and she could also rest assure that her story will also be told and is told in the present and in past tense in documentation without saying a word. I have a long way to go with fighting my battle 427 times for her. Rest assure...her story will be told in one heartbeat. 

There is no holding back in winning the battle 427 times 2 when it comes to loving the two people who are three years, four months apart from each other that I lost in my lifetime. I will not give into the battle I fought, because...GOD and his son JESUS are my captain from my latitude to my longitude, my battle will soon be a victory. 

What Sow...Sow Shall I Reap

 Book 185 - Special Edition Post

Luke 6:38 - 38. Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.

Galatians 6:8 - 8. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. 

2 Corinthians 9:6 - 6. But this I say, He which sleety sparingly shall reap also sparingly and he which sleety bountiful my shall reap also bountifully.

  

I wrote a letter in memory of my parents. I mostly wrote about my M O T H E R and my indiscretions I had against her when she was alive. Now...I reap what I sow through my son Zachary. I deserve what GOD and his son JESUS raft which is inflicted on me. I am going to take it, because I deserve it for the way I treated my M O T H E R. She continue to love me so much. Before she left me, she was at peace, and she forgave me with peace. I asked GOD and his son JESUS for forgiveness for my M O T H E R, and now, I am at peace.

My letter as it reads: 

I have issues dealing with the death of my parents. I know in my heart that my F AT H E R was the most important key to my existence, but...my M O T H E R was a different form of importance. She was the one who gave me life; she was the one who provided me comfort and with the knowledge to do so. She was my hover over me when things got bad. She made sure I was alright, along with my F A T H E R say in this. She made sure I had everything I needed to live in this world. Along with my F A T H E R, my M O T H E R was my safety net without confusion of what to do next. 

I have been taught by the best of the best. I have nothing but memories of my parents. Those memories continued with rules and regulations; the law of GOD and his son JESUS put into my parents hearts to instill it in me, so that I could learn from my mistakes if there were any. I can say right now, that I appreciate everything that my parents did for me when they were alive and well. I had a few bad patches with my M O T H E R I never got a chance to apologize to her about. Yes, I was a bad person only by choice at the time. 

I use to bad mouth my M O T H E R. My sister would tell me all the time, "To never talk to our M O T H E R like I did, and I did it anyway." But...my M O T H E R kept loving me even though, and she just kept smiling, never letting what I did bother her. In her heart, mind, body, and soul, she had already forgiven me for what I done to her. My M O T H E R was at peace through GOD and his son JESUS almighty. She had already forgiven me for all of indiscretions. I live through my reaping everyday through my son Zachary. 

He was so rebellious to me. He talks back to me just as I did my M O T H E R. Zachary did what he wanted and still doing what he wants just as I did my M O T H E R. He yells and screams at me just as I did to my M O T H E R. "I get it now!" I get it. What I sow...sow shall I reap. 

My reaping days is here in a ten fold through my son Zachary. He is totally letting me have it! Now I have the memory of my M O T H E R telling me so. She told me numerous times that everything I did to her was going to come back to me. It's here and it is ten times worst than I imagined for the way I treated her. I did love my M O T H E R with every breath I took and with every ounce of strength I had in my body, but...I didn't show her at the time when I treated her wrong when she was living on this earth. 

But...she forgave me before she she left me. Then...I asked GOD and his son JESUS to forgive me for what I did to my M O T H E R, and everything she had been through with me. I was totally amber to my F A T H E R, but...my M O T H E R rode the storm with me, my F A T H E R, and everyone else who did her wrong, and she just kept smiling to the four winds. I can say this with comfort, and with peace in my heart, "GOD and his son JESUS has forgiven me for my M O T H E R, and my M O T H E R has forgiven me through GOD and his on JESUS." 

I can say and continuously say, "I am at peace with it and myself included. I love you M O T H E R, I love you F A T H E R. Rest well.with the angels.

Dealing With Consequences And Repercussions

 Book 173

Galatians 6:7 - 8 - 7. Be not deceived; GOD is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. 8. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the spirit shall of the spirit reap life everlasting. 

Romans 6:23 - 23. For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of GOD is eternal life through JESUS Christ our LORD. 

1 John 1:9 - 9. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 

I find myself in deep thought about my M O T H E R and all the things I did to her when she was living. I know I'm reaping the consequences of my actions, and the repercussions on how I really treated her when things were so bad during a brief period of time in my life. M O T H E R tried to tell me some things to abide by and to take heed to, but...I would not listen to some of the things she warned me about according to what effect it will have on my life. I know that I'm paying for it and then some. My M O T H E R thought I hated her because of her outbursts towards me, being that she was just a old woman set in her way.  

I should of taken the fact to heart that my M O T H E R was just an old woman set in her way of things and I never should have been so hard on her. I had a attitude problem, I admit that! I needed to straighten that in order to be humble towards my M O T H E R when she had one of her outbursts. When I think of her, sometimes I just want her to argue with me about anything. That's how much I miss her knowing that I would never have the luxury of a M O T H E R in her mortal body again. I can only have her in spirit and in my memory. 

I can wish that everyone who still have their M O T H E R will treat her like a Q U E E N. I challenge that with everyone who still have their M O T H E R. It is a hard thing to go through life without my M O T H E R, because...she was the root of all things that mattered to me. I just miss her so much and I can't seem to come to reality of her death. That is a hard thing to do when it comes to having a M O T H E R who really have been there for me and my siblings through thick and thin and still...she landed on her feet when she got tripped up by anyone who would always keep her unbalanced. This is why the death of my M O T H E R is eating me up. With all the things I did in my past, it has come back to haunt me in a way it keeps me in tears. 

This is my season for reaping and sowing for my actions. I am suffering the consequences and the repercussions of my actions. This is by the rules and regulations of GOD when he wrote the Ten Commandments; the fifth commandment: Exodus 20:12 - Honor thy Father and thy Mother that thy days will be longer upon the earth in which the LORD thy GOD giveth thee. I now think about that commandment knowing that my M O T H E R and F A T H E R is not here anymore, it is instilled in my heart forever. It is a commandment that I would always abide by and learn from.

Tormented With Immediate Family Deception

Book 162

Matthew 5:38 - 39 - 38. Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for eye, and a tooth for a tooth; 39. But I say unto you, that ye resist not evil; but whosoever shall smite thee on they right cheek, turn to him the other also. 



Who knows what to do, or what to say about people you love so much. The word "family" mean so much to me. I couldn't fathom my family doing me, or mines wrong in a sense so logic, like my what my extended ex family did to my immediate family. You know...that extended ex family who deceived my immediate family in a way that was unfounded during the last six months of my FATHER'S sickness, and of his life. But...I don't want to get into that travesty, because...it's too painful to bare, and it's quite intolerable

I had an experience with a few of my "younger" family members, and I can't believe how they really act towards me, especially when its a love, and then a hate relationship. Sometimes I feel like I'm walking on egg shells with these two who seem to give me grief and heartbreak every chance they get. I choose not to enclose their names due to the extreme love I have. "No hate for them at all, because...they are my niece and nephew." What did I ever do to them?

I always question that logic.in a sense of understanding without judgement. But...you know, GOD and his son JESUS is good all the time when times are like this, and everything I'm going through. I found that my nephew in general loves to give out information to my niece...whenever something goes on in the apartment we're living. He spares no expense, nor a bet on "tattle tale" himself to death, if only a brief moment to my niece about what goes on, whether, or if anyone in the apartment is arguing about something, or they did something, my niece knows about. I found myself getting very upset about this deception my niece and nephew is carrying on. and I'm totally, and emotionally, and mentally tired of it. Even though...it's not my apartment, and I don't have any say over the renter of the apartment, but I'm considered the "older adult" surrounded by deception.

But...like I say, "GOD and his son JESUS is good all the time. Because...when I think of way they try to get rid of me and my son out of the apartment for what reason; I don't know, I still question why do they have this love...hate thing for me? The answers will come when consequences and repercussions gather at the crown of their heads to the soles of their feet. A brain is a terrible thing to waste these days. But...I pray that someday they will see the good in me that their blinded too; and to do this to their aunt, because...I'm set in my ways of how I do things, and it's that logic in itself is a fact of the matter.

I'm done! I'm at this very point of no return, and I'm very sick and tired of being treated like a martyr in the family, and this relic is too old, and it's rubbing off on my son Zachary. And 99.9% of the time, whatever happens, it's clearly not my fault, but...the fault of other who consistently provoke the situation and wants attention, while I get chewed out.  A few days ago, I acted out, not in haste, but...with heartbreak and hurt. You get sick and tired of being sick and tired! That's logical.

Let's Be Honest About The Things We Should Be Honest About!

Book 158

2 Corinthians 4:2 - 2. But have renounced the hidden things of dishonesty, not walking in craftiness, nor handing the word of GOD deceitfully; but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man's conscience in the sight of GOD.

1 Timothy 2:2 - 2. For kings, and for all that are in authority that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty. 

What more can I do about the situation I'm in with Alrick. He doesn't really understand what I'm trying to do to make his surprise more exciting. But...I told my twin sister Sherri to forget his surprise, and go with what I have with the money to Jamaica. $2,500 dollars to be exact! For me...I feel what I told my sister (to forget the surprise) will be a learning lesson for Alrick, to never doubt what I'm trying to do to make things better for us in Jamaica.

I know in my heart that he'll be upset with me, as he always have been, for a week; in and out of one argument to the next, and its about the money. How will I tell Alrick about the money I had in the bank for my trip to Jamaica? How will I tell him that I'm very short of the amount I said I had? How will I tell him that I had to use most of the money for things I had to do that were very important? I've kept this secret in far too long to let him know why my trip is prolonged.

When I told him about my sister and her husband Lorenzo had to cancel their trip to Las Vegas, Nevada, because of the "Corona Virus" that's lingering around the entire world, and that my son Zachary will not be home alone after all, he snapped on me in a heartbeat. We argued for at least an hour and a half about my sister and her husband's cancellation of their trip, and I don't why that was. I knew for sure that Alrick was going to ask me about their money, and the money I had in the bank. This was why I couldn't tell him about the money in the bank, because I'm very short of cash, and I need a little more to equal the amount I'm bringing to Jamaica (that my sister and her husband are going to give to me) instead of Alrick's surprise that I had in store for him. With all the arguments we had, is the reason I told my sister to cancel Alrick's surprise, and I didn't tell her why I cancelled the surprise.

Like I stated at the beginning of this post, "Cancellation of the surprise will be a learning lesson for Alrick" to never doubt me about anything I'm trying to do to make our lives better. That is the repercussions that one must endure for their attitude, spasms, and mayhem that was inflicted on me. But...most part, I deserve most of the problems that were inflicted on me for not telling Alrick about the money I had in the bank, and that it wasn't enough to really do anything, like taking care of the house the Alrick had reserved for us in Jamaica. I pray the house is still there in the name of JESUS! LORD I pray that it's still there 'reserved' for us to have for the entire month I will be in Jamaica.

I hope that Alrick will forgive me for everything I put him through. For the amount of love that he give me unconditionally, I really need to change my ways, as he stated to me in a conversation we had over a week ago, I believe. I guess I never had that kind of love before, not even with my son's father. I know now how important I am to Alrick. I admit to all the problems I cause Alrick for not disclosing the truth about the money I had in the bank.

I guess I felt...I was most afraid that I would lose my "sweet boy" who's all man for his age...over twenty plus years my senior. I guess I was to...testing myself to see how much this man love me. But still...I'm so afraid I will lose my sweet boy! I pray that he allow me to still come and be with him as his wife in Jamaica. I can only hope when he read this post if the offer still stand and that he will still love me, and be his wife. This is a learning lesson for me as well!

"Well...I had to express myself on 'electronic paper' to prove a point to my fiance, because I couldn't tell him to his face in fear that he would leave me." 

For My Father: Who Rides On Deception?

Book 155

2 Chronicles 29:35 - 35. And also the burnt offerings were in abundance with the fat of the peace offerings, and the drink of offerings for every burnt offering. So the service of the house of the LORD was set in order

Synopsis - Through my felling's I still have over my FATHER'S passing, my post expresses what I feel everyday of my life, when I can't stop thinking of my FATHER, and everything that has happen. One thing is certain I have GOD and his son JESUS in my life, and that's all I need to get through the day of my grief, my tears, my memories of my FATHER through and through.

I didn't feel the need to write about my FATHER throughout the month of February, even though, his birthday was in the month. I felt it was too painful to write about my FATHER until now. He is truly missed every hour of the day, day after day, month after month, year after year. I still can't fathom his passing, but...I've learned to deal with the way he went was so tragic. Why I say tragic?

The logic of my FATHER'S passing was beyond what I didn't expect until he told me what was happening to him before he went into a coma indefinitely. When he told me that "She's killing me" that and every ounce of anger in me took toll on my way of thinking, and my actions were well noted in this blog. I could never forget what I think Minnie Lou Wright did to her brother behind closed doors (maybe telling the hospice nurse to administer an overdose of morphine to my FATHER)  leaving my mother (my FATHER'S wife) myself, my twin sister Sherri, and my brother Wesley Jr. without knowledge of what's going on behind that closed door during the time his blood family (immediate) should of been by his side. That was why my FATHER said to my face, "She's killing me." That in itself will leave a scar with me for the rest of my life. 

"Wow beyond to those who do evil upon others" like myself, my mother Ruth, my twin sister Sherri and my brother Wesley Jr.. "What Minnie Lou sow...sow shall she reap all the conscequences, and all the repercussions of her actions towards us, and especially towards my FATHER ultimately." She maybe...or she claim that she is so 'holy' but her day is coming, thus saith the LORD thy GOD, and anyone else who was involved putting my immediate family through hell throughout my FATHER'S sickness. Thank GOD...I can now move on! I was hard not to think that this was my FATHER'S birthday month. 

All is done! What happened in the past...some say...should stay in the past. My FATHER is part of that past, and none of us can't bring him back to us. I continue to think about him a whole lot. Its hard not to under the circumstances revolving around his death. But...I'm trying to live each day with GOD and his son JESUS grace, trust, love, and faith in my pilots. 

Minnie Lou and all who was involved, will never rest easy until they apologize to my family for their foul odor of evil, their twisted bloody lies, and the Power of Attorney Minnie Lou had over my FATHER'S life in conflict over our lives. I want the world to know this about Minnie Lou and her gang of monsters who racked havoc and chaos over my immediate family lives. GOD and his son JESUS removes stumbling blocks out of the way, so the meek can prosper. I can finally deal with that!

We Will Never Forget The One We Love This Holiday Season

Book 152

Numbers 35:31 - 31. Moreover ye shall take no satisfaction for the life of a murderer, which is guilty of death: but he shall be surely put to death

I miss my popski so much...I can't began to fathom what it's been like for us. We think of him everyday, especially around this time of the year, from the day of my FATHER'S death on the 4th of December 2016, three years ago. It's hard not to think of him when it comes to missing his barbecue. We (Sherri,Wesley Jr. and I) haven't been the best of children towards him, I admit that, but...we saw him when we needed to see him) and we continued to come, and we came, and we saw him before we knew fully that our FATHER was really sick.

"That part was kept from us!"  But...I don't want to rehash the past, because it's a bum rush; we (the family) would like to keep old relic in it's place. It's time to think ahead into the future, because...I finally after all this time...let my FATHER go, because I can't bring him back to us ever, but...I would let GOD'S vengeance take over what was done to my MOTHER and his children. We forgive and love everyone involved, but...we will never forget it for infinity. It's not easy to forget what was once a beautiful family...to no family connection at all, because of what was done to my family. No more grudges held against those culprits, because they will meet their day of judgement. I'm only saying what I must say; I'm only expressing how I really feel, and it's only natural to do so when the man we (the family) love has been taken from us for infinity. But...like I said, "We (the family) must let old relic go...and for it to our past tense.

GOD and his sons vengeance is their virtue to fight our battles, but...karma will soon meet up with those who meant my family sorrow. I can say, "I'm comfortable with the way I feel about most things...one...is the death of my FATHER and loving him enough to let him go." Like I said...I can't bring him back to life, but I must go on with living life to the fullest in the name of my pilots. Nothing in my life without my FATHER will never be the same, but...I must go on, no matter how much it hurt. All I have is memories of a lifetime.

I'll settle for those fine memories, because...it's all I have to hold onto.

When We Lease Expect It

Book 149

Job 36:17 - 17. But thou hast fulfilled the judgment of the wicked; judgement and justice take hold on thee. 

I never thought that this could happen to us in a man fold, but...our family can't do nothing about it now. Our situation can't even be won in court, even if we took a fine tooth comb through the facts of the matter when our lease was terminated. If we were not on a lease (when it was time for it to be renewed) and we are living month to month, then at any time the landlord had can relinquish their home and property back from us. That's what the judge would say! Yes...our family has a little under three weeks to vacate the premises.

What a bad situation to be in! But...with GOD almighty and his son JESUS in charge of our situation; what turns out to be a no win situation, can be a wonderful situation turned around by GOD almighty and his son JESUS to provide for his children at no cost. My family and I have already started packing some of our stuff, but...a little at a time until we're finished packing up the house. In a way...I'm kind of glad that we're moving (I suggested this months prior to our eviction notice, that we needed to go ahead and give up the two acres and the home, because of what ever issues the landlord had with the land the home is sitting on) but its specifically wrong time of the year to be moving out of a home with no money to spare after we (the family) had already paid the rent. Thanksgiving haven't reached our equation as of yet as I speak.

I know that my family and I will be fine once we find another home to live in, even if we don't have the money to move. This is where faith come in for all of us! This we can fathom its mystery, but...with belief unconditionally. So with this said, none of us are worried about the money, or where we're going to live, because we all know that GOD and his son JESUS are in charge of our situation. GOD'S vengeance will play a role in the landlord's decision to not require a lease for my family and I to sign off on, instead of living from month to month (in which the landlord set it up for our lease to be terminated) but...with this said, my family and I will relinquish their home and land back to them without a fight. Our move could be where the grass is greener, if GOD and his son JESUS will have every thing to do with this situation. Trusting and giving our situation to our pilots is the key to good living...when we get there.

When Demands Are Overrated

Book 148

Proverbs 3:6 - 6. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. 

                16:1 - 1. The preparations of the heart in man, and the answer of the tongue, is from the      LORD.

                16:9 - 9. A man's heart deciseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps. 

*I will keep this "girl" anonymous throughout my post



I'm starting to think that I had this girl wrong from the get go. I thought that she would change her tune about a whole lot of stuff, but...I was totally wrong when I comes her way of thinking about the consequences and the repercussions of her actions. Here's what happened! She tried to plan a birthday party for her son, which is common for someone who loves her son very much. But...here's the problem! She planned her son's birthday party without telling my twin sister Sherri and her husband about it.

So what is the verdict of the situation of this girl's son's birthday party? Well...here is the answer! I don't think Sherri was going to let this girl have the birthday party at our family home. Or at least...for now, being so that this girl's son's birthday party is tomorrow. Here's what I know. If you'r e going to plan something as important as birthday party, tell the person, or person's in charge, and are the heads of the home, and not plan anything ahead of self, if it can be helped.

I guess this girl thought she had more leverage than my twin sister and her husband to request her demands anytime she felt like dropping them like a dime on a catch. Common sense will tell her otherwise not to do what she did instantaneously without thinking ahead of herself, and making strong demands without telling my twin sister and her husband about her plan to have her son's  birthday party at our home. It's only logical to assume right and let my twin sister and her husband know extremely ahead of time, and not ahead of self, just like this girl has done. With this said, it would give awesome quality on our way of thinking that making demands is a way of life without suffering it consequences and the repercussions that comes along with those demands. Think twice and ask first before you place a demand cause you think you can anytime.

DITTO!!!!!

When Your Burden Down With Fear

Book 147

Isaiah 41:10 - 10. Fear thou not; for i am with thee. Be not dismayed; for I am thy GOD. I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.




*The two young women in this post, will remain anonymous


I found myself in the midst of being burden down with a situation completely out of my control. I believe my family feel the same vibes as well. There is this young woman naive to the fact. She has two children she has no idea how to take care of. Babies to be exact! Soon after she had one baby, she had another already developing in the process.

What do you say to a woman who couldn't resist the fact that she laid down and got another baby before her first could turn a year old that she couldn't take care of without assistance? Here's how the story goes. She was living with her what was suppose to be her sister-in-law. She had asked if she and her crying babies stay with my family until her suppose to be sister-in-law get her lights on again, due to non payment on time. My brother-in-law (of whom I will keep anonymous) had a heart for this girl; he let her stay until her suppose to be sister-in-law get her lights turned back on.

One week and a day pass, and still no word from her suppose to be sister-in-law confirming if she got the lights back on. And from my point of view, I didn't see this girl, whose staying with us, confirming to us that her suppose to be sister-in-law confirming to her that she got the lights turned on. So what's the verdict here? I feel the girl was trying to find her way in a already crowded home with consistently crying babies. Don't get me wrong...I do have a heart for this girl, but...with a girl who has no job, no kind of future to look forward to without an ambition to consume her independence, whose dependence on all of us who already live in the home; who pay all the bills together, has to pull her weight too.

I have a problem with that, because she is totally needy, I mean really needy! Still...don't get me wrong for a person in a dire situation, but...I feel she's not trying hard enough to find her way in the world for her two babies, and it bothers me. She has become a burden on my family, I hate to say. I don't know if she's afraid to go out on her own with her babies! She states she has put in sixteen applications, and no one is calling her for an interview. I'm wondering if she's checking on each application to speed up the process.

Aggravate the people behind the applications. Do what you have too to speed up that process of getting a job at least. She doesn't do that! So what to think when everyone in my house thinks she's a burden? Because...none of us believe she's trying to find a job if she doesn't aggravate the employers, or try picking up the phone and making a phone call to check on her applications.

So what to think when someone like her is a burden on you and the family? We are all thinking of the children in the situation, and she's given so many chances to better herself. But...in so many cases pending against her, we feel she's not trying to give us that notion that she wants a job for one...and to better herself for her children and herself. She is totally a burden with fear in her heart to fail otherwise, depending on others every single day without a notion to pick up the phone and check on her applications to really get a job. Once a freeloader, always a freeloader is the vibes I'm receiving from this girl.

What's the verdict again? I feel she should return back to the woman she was living with, because I truly believe she has had the lights back on for at least almost a week ago. "At least that's what I think, I don't want to judge it.

Our Lives In Purgatory

Book 144

2 Corinthians 5:10 - 10. For we must all appear before the judement seat of Christ; that everyone may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad.

Matthew 5:26 - 26. Verily I say unto thee, thous shalt by no means come out thence, till thou hast paid the uttermost farthing.

Revelation 20:12 - 12. And I saw the dead, samll and great, stand before GOD; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life; and the dead was judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works. 

When it's prudent to handle all of our troubles with such good judgment of those who have hurt us the most in our lives; I put so much wisdom in my heart to leave my troubles where they may lie and plan for the future to come...if so...in the name of JESUS to spare all of our lives. It's totally common sense to lay aside what was once was in our past, and let GOD and his son JESUS to fight "all" our battles with a vengeance. I had that chance to let go of my past, and live for what GOD and his son JESUS has in store for me. In order to get it right with my pilots, I have to have a certain purpose in my life in order for me to walk that narrow path towards righteousness. That's my resolution, to find that purpose in which it gives me divine glory to live each day without any flaws, even though...that would also be a challenge to work towards making things right in my life...with my pilots help.

A hard and demanding life to look forward to; and there is so much temptation out there just waiting to curve me back into damnation. I don't want to ever go that route again, and that's if I can help it! With this said, I had to give an example of an experience I had on the morning of September 11...the day....eighteen years later, after the towers of the World Trade Center, the Pentagon, and Shanksville, Pennsylvania fell to a terrorist attack. I was to be at a doctors appointment at 9:45 am, and I decided to go and get some breakfast from a fast food restaurant known as Krystal's. There...I was faced with a situation I was not expecting from a employee of this fast food chain.

I went in and ordered my usual breakfast: A sausage, egg, and cheese scrambler, orange juice and coffee. I proceeded to present my order to this employee....a woman with sort of a husky type build, tall, with short blue bobbed hair. At that particular moment...I was blinded by knowledge of this woman's actions, as she ignored my order as I gave it to her. I looked at her with a surprised look for the way she treated me and I said, "What did I do to deserve this...like I wasn't there, as she proceeded to the next register, and to converse with her friends briefly like I was totally invisible, like I didn't give her my order." She didn't even key in my order. It took a young woman (in the drive-thru) with respect for the customer to take my full order.

After my order was taken, I waited a little under five minutes for receive my order from this woman. She then...proceeded to fill my order. I decided to stay inside the restaurant to have my breakfast...until I found a problem with my scrambler. My breakfast bowl was half full; my scrambler only had the sausage and grits, but no eggs. So I carried my it back up to complain!

And in a sarcastic way, this woman asked me, "What's wrong?" I told her, "My scrambler looked half full, and I didn't have any eggs." She told me,"There is eggs in your scrambler." I went back to my table to check to see if I had any eggs in my scrambler, since she told me the eggs was in the bottom of the bowl, instead of the grits being at the bottom...the correct way.

I checked my scrambler with my spoon. I saw that there were no eggs present! I took my scrambler back to the counter to complain again. This woman asked, "What's wrong now in a sarcastic way?" I told her in a respectful way, "There were no eggs in my scrambler!" 

She looked at me in a way that will kill over if I were a opossum fiercely runned over with a car in the road. It took another respectful woman to accommodate me by filling my order completely. She gave me a side of eggs in my scrambler. I thanked her kindly for filling my order. My point was this, "When a person like myself experience ignorance at its entirety, I took it upon myself to turn the other cheek and look the other way as making a mends to not disrespect and act ignorant like this woman did, who seemed to me like she had a chip on her shoulder, just because I came into the restaurant (Krystal's) to order breakfast.

If my experience as a customer "hindered" her in a way when certain people (like myself) come into a restaurant (Krystal's) to order fast food...to this woman...customers like myself shouldn't be "beautiful on the inside and out" or "have a respectful mind to respect others as I would like to be respected for myself" than to have a "ghetto fascious mind with no common sense whatsoever" to give her attention (without judgment) to people like herself. I didn't deserve how I was treated just because I went into Krystal's to order breakfast was (to her) my indiscretion. I needed to present myself without being mad, or acting without haste. It in return...it gives me more leverage to do a good will in the name of GOD and his son JESUS. I that brief instance, I came out looking like a beautiful white rose, than the despair of a thorny bush in the brush on a warm sunny day.

It takes everything in ones power to get things right before the day of judgment day. I don't want to find myself left back in a time of despair with a blank look on my face, or finding out where I am and how I'm going find myself through that narrow path towards the passion of glory. I choose to look the other way without hesitation or haste, and from mistreating a person who has done nothing to me in anguish towards my better judgment. With that said, it brings me to a comment one of my ex. aunts said and how we really feel about her, when she thinks we (my brother, my sister and I) hate her. because of what she and everyone put us through during the time my FATHER was sick, and until he died. I nor my siblings, or my mother don't hold any grudges towards her, or either one of my ex. aunts and my ex. uncle and other people in my ex. family who acted with their indiscretions.

I choose not to talk to them, or have anything to do with them in order to keep down confusion, or any haste towards my extended family, I really hate it has to be this way, when a Power of Attorney with everyone's signature attached to it was the key to destruction of my extended family. At least two of them backed out of the Power of Attorney, because they said, "This is wrong! What you're doing is wrong to my brother's family." All this didn't have to be that way, if money was the resort of it taken to be their root of evil. I for one can't deal with the fact that it happened; GOD help me and continue to help me with my heart.

Love, Honor And To Be Trustworthy

Book 142

1 Corinthians 4:2 - 2. Moreover it is required in stewards, that a man be found.



* Using the word "him" keep his identify partially anonymous


I don't know what he want sometimes. I'm trying to accept the fact that he has a strong jealousy streak that's really beginning to push me away. I don't know what else to do to make him believe whatever I tell him. The majority of the time, I feel this since of him twisting everything around about what I tell him about my activities and he make it seem like I'm cheating, or doing things that I haven't gotten any business doing. It's like...I don't know what to do, or what to tell him that would make him understand me and what I do with my time, whether it's spending time with my family, or putting my thinking cap into my writing.

I'm doing everything in my power to not mess up (in other terms...f***) up what we have together...as though his thoughts became judgmental when it came to my three Facebook profiles that I have. One is a public profile...which I'm never posting, or sharing anything on, and the other two are profiles I have, they are private profiles. The first of my private profiles, I rarely never post onto it, but...only to share my blog posts to my Facebook Page: Author Terri Celestine Brunson.  That profile also has people on it (my ex. extended family) that I'm not associated with anymore, because of what happened to my FATHER, but...my Facebook pages: Author Terri Celestine Brunson and The Minorities are part of this first private profile and can never erase it. So with that said, I've decided to make another Facebook profile...keeping my ex extended family members away from it.

This profile...I do not use my last name, because of my ex. extended family history and bloodline. I don't want nothing to do with my last name, even though it is my bloodline. There...I have other pages that I share posts from my other blogs: Celestine's Coffee Cup,and The Chocolate Chronicles and Socialites Social Club, but...no writing on it's profile. My significant other thinks I'm hiding something from him by writing on all three of my profiles, or good as to say that I may have other people that I'm writing to and that's not at all the case. What I'm doing is sharing my work to my pages, because that's what I do.

Writing is what I do! I don't have time for Facebook, or its shenanigans in general. My love also states that I have accepted a man on my recent profile...the second private profile, that I didn't know was his friend, but...I don't associate with him at anytime, even though I accepted his friendship. I'm only human here and I'm getting my head bitten off by him, because I accepted a man of whom I don't associate with. With this said...I can't erase this profile, because my Facebook pages are on this recent profile...my second profile.

So what to do about how I feel about things when it comes to the man I love? Why do he find things to argue about? I'm doing everything in my power to support him; give him what he want and to love him unconditionally. It's like when he goes out to find things in and about my life that I had before we met, he doesn't approve of, he brings it to my attention, and then he argue with me about it. How do I cope with the fact I have a man with this jealous streak that I'm still afraid of?

I trying so hard not to break like glass, or fall to pieces like the leaves during the fall season. I love this man, but...he makes me feel like I got to be careful of everything I do. Just a brief second of my happiness and listening to my music, he told me not to screw up on him; or break his heart. Why would I want to screw anything up with us, or break his heart? What trust does he have in me to say what he said to me?

I'm truly hurting from the outburst he consumed on my conscience. So what I did...was to let him know to calm his demeanor and call it a early morning so I can do some thinking and write this post. Anytime I write a post it's about what I'm thinking and the state of mind I'm in. Even with my thoughts during the time I wrote about my FATHER on this blog site for years in order to cope with my heart of losing him, I'm writing about the man I love and where his mind is sometimes. Like I said, "I'm only human sometimes with what I do and did before I met him."

What I did in my life before I met him wasn't unfaithfulness, and I didn't have any other relationship other than my son's father. I didn't know I was going to experience being careful about everything I do. But...what I'm doing is only part of my honesty to him with out deception, or not to encounter any indiscretions of any sort. All I can do is to do my best and not keep anything a secret, or it will be an indiscretion I can't put myself out of. So with this said, "All I can do is talk to him and make him understand me for a change and what I'm about, so he doesn't think I'm cheating on him, or got secrets that I'm keeping from him. I also don't want be stuck in a situation to the point that he doesn't believe, or trust me, because I don't know what I do if he think that I can't be trusted, or if it's the other way around for me to think of him in the same manner otherwise.

"I'm only human, but...I'm sharing my honesty in return for his trust in me and my trust in him." Communication is the key to an understanding and why things happen, and how to mend what could be broken in the matter of our relationship!

Understanding Zachary's World

Book 141

Job 4:6 - 6. Is not this thy fear, thy confidence, thy hope, and the uprightness of thy ways. 

        31:24 - 24. If I have made gold my hope, or have said to the fine gold, thou art my confidence.

Psalms 118:8 - 8. It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. 

Isaiah 30:15 - 15. For thus saith the LORD GOD, the Holy One of Israel; in returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength; and ye would not. 

Acts 28:31 - 31. Preaching the kingdom of GOD, and teaching those things which concern the LORD JESUS Christ, with all confidence, no man forbidding him.

2 Corinthians 7:16 - 16. I rejoice therefore that I have confidence in you in all things. 

Galatians 5:10 - 10. I have confidence in you through the LORD, that ye will be none otherwise minded: but he that troubleth you shall bear his judgment, whosoever he be. 

I have a hard time putting the pieces of Zachary's puzzle together sometimes. It's hard to imagine the magnitude of which piece goes with which! What I'm trying to say is, when it comes to finding those different pieces of Zachary's puzzle, because it has to be put together by its color code, And from those pieces of Zachary's puzzle, I began to think about the various stages of his internal emotions that he's been dealing with for a brief period of time. For Zachary...it's being accepted where ever he goes, and what ever he does to be acknowledged for who he is. I figure that one piece of Zachary's puzzle will always make a difference in finding the cause  that triggered his internal emotions about being accepted on his football team.

And when that cause, it has  become a factor of what I'm trying to seek about my son's internal emotions, and I pray to GOD...whatever it may be, the answer will become my mission to figure out its mystery that has been plaguing my son for quite sometime, and for him being accepted as a young man with Autism on his football team; and  then I will see all the pieces of Zachary's puzzle come together correctly by its color code. I've watched some of the head coaches (one in particular) on (JV) Zachary's Junior Varsity team, place his favorite team players in positions they want to be in. I find that every time Zachary wants a certain position (Defense End... which is his strength and more action) he doesn't receive where his strength makes a difference and  it will become a factor of Zachary's goals that will lead him towards winning championships for his team. But...he is consistently placed on the offensive side of the field, where he doesn't want to be, because of the limited action the offensive side of the field gives with the option to block in order to protect the quarterback. The coaches lack of concern for Zachary, it has caused quite a bit of concern for me and for Zachary to accept the fact that this one head coach will put him where he's doesn't want to be to keep him out of the way of his favorite team players.

I'm not going to tolerate Zachary being ignored of the benefits of being where he want to be to accomplish his goal and determination of taking down the quarterback. This was why I felt that there will be many games lost because of crooked coaches who only want to keep their favorites team players in the midst of the field to win games, instead of placing good players (like my son) who I feel will take his football team to championships. Zachary is that player with determination and strength to do what he need to do to bring his football team towards championships, if he's given a chance to prove himself worthy of the position he could have as defensive end. It seems that I'm taken back to the last team Zachary hardly played on where he no real chances to play in any of the games, because he was always on the sideline...even at his practice too.

I always felt his Autism had everything to do with why Zachary was extremely limited to the amount of games he could play in. That's why I changed team organization with the feeling that the grass was greener on the other side of the goal line. I'm not going through another organization (and it's an excellent organization with the Lakeland Eagles) of crooked coaches. I would love to see one coach in the midst of other coaches that will give a darn about every last one of his team players and not just a few that are their personal favorites. I'm not tolerating it! Not another year.

I'm going acknowledge my feelings to the coach who is in fact, part of my problem when it comes to Zachary. Now I'm starting to see all the pieces of Zachary's puzzle coming together by color code. All I got to do is acknowledge my feelings to the coach that was giving me a lot of problems when it came to the position Zachary wanted to play. That last piece of the puzzle...the only piece...would fit nicely with all the other surrounding color coded pieces of Zachary's puzzle. His puzzle will be officially complete, and his internal emotions will be reduced with confidence in himself to strive for the goal he wants to achieve, and that's going after the quarterback.

Feelings Of An Epiphany

Book 140

2 Timothy 3:16 - 16. All scripture is given by inspiration of GOD, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness. 



I find myself in a breakthrough of my mind, body and soul. Things as though I've seen only through philosophical discoveries. What are those discoveries? It has been discovered that I am more at peace in my life. I feel like I've been more enlightened in my mind than anything I've ever experienced during my time of despair. I now do this without anger or haste in my heart. I do it very calmly. 

I know how to handle things better as time progresses and I move on with my life. I will not fail with this instance that has brought me to experience wonderful beginnings that has lead me to prosperity. There were so many disappointments in my life, it was hard to fathom.  Here is one instance I had to bring forth that kept me in total despair: 1. Letting go what was once was in my life that kept me angry...the indiscretions of my ex aunts. 2. What was understood in the mind not will be devoured by my self pity. 3. Living in peace without haste for anyone. I find myself without these instances in my life. I find myself living better than I have ever lived.  

All and all...it's a good feeling to have and I thank GOD and his son JESUS for it. I found my "Epiphany" a realization for a breakthrough, and I don't resist myself in turning back to it's madness. I'm too happy to go backwards, obtaining a unclear past! I want to keep moving on to bigger and better things. I found my breakthrough in real life that I don't mind sharing. 

I found happiness in one that brings me joy. I can only pray that "he" will continue to bring me joy in life. I can't take another misconception of a relationship; another failure to understand what happened, and why it happened. I'm mended with confidence, love, joy, and happiness. I would love fate to keep me hanging towards the horizon, and keep me afloat without the harshness of despair. 

Only my significant one and I can travel that fate...with my son in tow, and another one on the way soon! I'm at a breakthrough in my life that keeps me in peace. I'm enjoying ounce of gratitude of it. 

My Disclosed Revelation

Book 137

Isaiah 26:3 - 3. Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee because he trusteth in thee. 

John 14:27 - 27. Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. 

John 16:33 - 33. These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. 

I find myself in an imaginable state. I start to wonder about my life sometimes; where it's going to lead, or how it's going to turn out for me in order to take it into the future. Not everyday is promised, but...I'm going to live one day at a time, as to where GOD sees fit for me to continue on. Somewhere in my mind, thoughts of my FATHER seem to occur to me almost instantly. No matter where I am, or what I do, thoughts of him seem to over take my entire imagination.

It will never be the same without my FATHER'S presents. I've learned to deal with what is hard for me to forget. I've totally settled that in my mind, just before I started to go crazy about the things I can't change. I don't want to consistently wallow in what was once was. I needed to carry on with my life as I see it.

When I look in a mirror, sometimes I see myself slightly unhappy, even if it's for a brief moment. My image faltered. It appeared to me as disfigured and unbalanced. If only I can find that smile somewhere within my disfigured and unbalanced face, I know I would feel better about moving on from my past and grief. And I have!

The image I see in the mirror has completely sharpened its contrast. I now see myself smiling more than I have ever smile. It's not so hard to do when a person like myself turn a frown into a vibrant smiley face. I don't want to keep wallowing in grief, nor my past. I want to keep on moving with all of the good memories disclosed I have of my FATHER. They are all I have to hold onto.

Thank You For Your Support In The Three Year Anniversary Of Author Terri Celestine Brunson

Book 132 - Special Edition Post - It's Been Three Years -

Romans 12:18 - If it be possible, as much a lieth in you, live peaceable with all men. 

I would like to thank everyone for their support in bringing my blog site Author Terri Celestine Brunson to it's conglomerate and blossoming success. It's been quite a pleasure to be loved for what I do in bringing to everyone worldwide heart felt and heart breaking stories that would capture those he read and take my stories to heart. It's been three years since I started this blog site in memory of my FATHER, Wesley Brunson Sr.  Author Terri Celestine Brunson also covers the extreme extent of what my family and I went through with the main source of our hell and the havoc and chaos, my ex aunt, Minnie Lou Wright. She...who virtually claimed Power of Attorney over my FATHER'S health and his life against my immediate family in her quest to rack devious power over my immediate family and I in order to gain control of his life, his possessions and most definitely, his finances.

Another party who were specifically involved in this hell and the havoc and chaos, I choose not to mention her in order to keep her totally anonymous for particular reasons I don't really care to discuss.  But...all that is over now! I don't care to discuss it anymore. It brings me to this point of letting what happen to my immediate family and I go, and I'm striving to let it go, and forgive those who caused us so much hell and total havoc and chaos. What I want is to finally receive my blessings from GOD and his son JESUS for forgiving those who deceived my family and I in the worst possible way to the point of our total silence.

I feel it's better that way to keep the peace! A nod here and there when I see my ex aunt Minnie Lou and the other one who cause my family and I despair, and is only right to "Kill their kindness with their weakness" and display it with smiles of joy, happiness and glory. What I'm saying to everyone who supported me throughout the success of my blog site Author Terri Celestine Brunson is...thank you very much for making three years of my blog site what it is today. I really appreciate it!