What More Can I Take?

Book 63

Psalms 31:9 - 10:  9. Have mercy upon me, O LORD, for I am in trouble; mine eye is consumed with grief, (yea), my soul and my belly.  10. For my life is spent with grief, and my years with sighing; my strength faileth because of mine iniquity, and my bones are consumed. 

When I think about trying my best to get over the death of my father, Wesley Brunson Sr. more and more obstacles are placed directly in my way with me coming to terms and reality from my father's death. I found out something I could not believe that has happened. I found out where my father contracted the most dirtiest disease in the world on top of stage four Cirhosis, Hepititis B and Diabetes. "Mercer!" The one place my immediate family and I would not of placed my father while he was ill and that was a nursing home. 

Two to be exact! My ex aunt is the culprit since she had Power of Attorney and that she's totally responsible for my father contracting mercer through his stay in one of the two nursing homes that she placed him in. How do feel about this? I'm mad as Hades! I always wondered where my father caught mercer. When I think of my father suffering in a nursing home in pain, mistreated and by GOD his son JESUS...if any abuse in those nursing homes and throughout all that he's been through for the last six months of his life, I get totally angry and frustrated to the maximum extent.

So much has happened and all I could say is GOD and his son JESUS...help me to over come this deceit and the total damage my ex aunt has caused and placed in the lives of my immediate family and myself. Father GOD in the name of your son JESUS, help me with my broken heart and grief, help my twin sister Sherri as well. I pray that my father get justice for everything that has happened to him. Father GOD and his son JESUS help my family and I...especially my twin sister Sherri and I over come our extreme hurt, grief and anger that we have for everything that has happened to us and ultimately what happened to to our father. For one day...my family and I can be healed from the devastation, the deceit and the Hades my ex aunt put my family and I through with the death of my father, Wesley Brunson Sr.

I pray in your mighty and Holy name GOD and your son JESUS, help my family and I find comfort.  

When The Consequences And The Repercussions Catches Up With You

Book 62

Galatians 6:7 - 8:  7. Be not deceived; GOD is not mocked; for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.  8. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the spirit reap life everlasting. 

Anonymous: My ex aunt...I choose to have nothing to do with ever again. There is not one ounce of hate for her, because I have a conscience. The truth is, "She mean nothing to me now and that she can't tell me nothing about nothing!" It's the only way I can try to cope with what happened ultimately to my father and to my immediate family.

"What she sow...sow shall she continue to reap hard with GOD and his son JESUS vengeance have the greatest effect on her life and who she choose to hurt ultimately." I'm never going to forget my father Wesley Brunson Sr. exact words to me one day and half before he died on December 4, 2016. It's been nine months and I'm still grieving hard. I miss my father so much! There was not one single solitary day I didn't think about him...ever!

I visited my father's grave just days ago. I sat for just a brief moment and stared at his grave from my car. I couldn't get out of my car, because I was so weak with tears and grief. I was also very angry because my ex aunt helped put him in his grave. I'm never going to forget that for as long as I live. 

Still...I'm not going to touch what GOD and his son JESUS can do better than myself. "Vengeance is totally in their hands to continue to fight my battles." I pray for guidance and understanding without questioning GOD and his son JESUS. I pray everyday for GOD and his JESUS to continue to help me with my broken heart and my extreme grief. I don't think people understand why my grief is so severe and great. I hope everyone can understand the magnitude of the pure Hades my ex aunt put my family and I through during my father's illness...before and after his death.

To my ex aunt, "GOD isn't done with her yet!" She will pay for drugging my father; she will pay for talking against my family to my father...telling us that my father didn't like us; she will pay for being in the way of my family when my father needed us the most. She still has to pay for my father being in a casket and what she did to my father ultimately and my immediate family throughout the last six months of his life. 

My ex aunt still has many consequences and repercussions she still has to face in vengeance and in the eyes of GOD and his son JESUS. I still want get in the way of that! Her eyes will be finally opened to the extreme damage she caused and breaking up the extended and my immediate family severely and what I've been finding out (resource wise) for the past nine months to be true. I hate to be my ex aunt right now when GOD and his son JESUS vengeance continue to reign on her conscience and her body. She will continue to receive what is "just" in the eyes of GOD and his son JESUS and my father will receive his justice. 

Live Laugh Love Life

Book 61

John 3:16 - 16.  For GOD so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. 

Psalms 37:4 - 4. Delight theyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. 

John 10:10 - 10. The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

Living for the future is a spiritual blessing my family and I will choose to live our lives to the fullest. We're getting ready for a cruise to the Key West, Florida, the Grand Caymans, and Cozumel, Mexico this fall coming on October 23, my mother Ruth's birthday. "What a cool birthday present for my mother! My immediate family are totally excited. I know my son Zachary and I can't wait until that blessed day to arrive.

My sister-in-law Neyome is back home in Hatton, Sri Lanka tending to business and having evening attire made for (the women in our immediate family) to wear on our fall cruise when we go out for dinner that evening on the first day of our cruise. I know my immediate family and I can't wait until she come back home to America.  I know my brother Wesley Jr. especially misses his wife Neyome and can't wait until she's home again here in America. My GOD and his son JESUS...I'm so happy about life and I can't begin to thank you enough for allowing my family and I to live just one day at a time that you've given to all of us each day we live life to the fullest. Continued...ignoring those who chooses to keep making our lives their own, because we have no time for ignorance, dramatic spasms, and controversy that will continue to bring us down.

Living for every moment that GOD and his son JESUS gives us was everyday that wasn't promised to us by their awesome will. My family and I are thankful that we can Laugh about the things in life that keeps us smiling everyday without any haste from those who choose to try and make us as miserable as they are with their life without smiles and joy. Loving life is beyond all means of living for the future. My family and I will enjoy planning our cruises in many years to come, if its the will of GOD and his son JESUS.  Who wouldn't want to be happy with that?

GOD and his son JESUS has been very good to my immediate family and I...I would like to treasure that as spiritual blessing for infinity.  I will continue to get down on these hurt, aching, neuropathy filled bending knees to thank my pilots for everything they've done for me especially.  I finally can have peace in my life after the death of my father, Wesley Brunson Sr. and move on with living, laughing and loving life. I pray for guidance and comfort knowing that my father is in the hands of my pilots. He's happy living laughing and loving life in Heaven.

No more worries here! I can continue to say, "Thank You GOD and your son JESUS for allowing my immediate family to live without haste and without unhappiness from our past almost eight months before war almost claimed it's victory over the horizon. Victory was GOD and his son JESUS! Vengeance was theirs to begin with. No holds barred with unhappiness any more.

Living, Laughing and Loving is part of my family's vocabulary now! My family and I are going to keep planning for the future, our cruises and any other trips we may be taking if its the will of GOD and his son JESUS. No more extended family woes who choose to keep giving us grief with their indiscretions and fake love. They all know who they are. My immediate family and I still have .5% of our extended who still gives us their love in many ways.

Jealousy Is Not An Option

Book 60

Ecclesiates 3:1-8 - 1. To every thing there is a season, and time to every purpose under the heaven: 2. A time to be born, and time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; 3. A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; 4. A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; 5. A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; 6. A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; 7. A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; 8. A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

1 Samuel 26: 23-24 - 23. The LORD render to every man his righteousness and his faithfulness: for the LORD delivered thee into my hand to day, but I would not stretch forth mine hand against the LORD's anointed. 24. And behold, as thy life was much set by this day in mine eyes, so let my life be much set by in the eyes of the LORD, and let him deliver me out of all tribulation.

5

Father GOD in the name of your son JESUS; I have so much I want to pray about. I know that you both are my pilots. I can come to you both anytime of day, the hour of every minute, for every second down to the micro second that I can converse with you both about. "What a farce my family and I are dealing with." Satan and his imps are trying to surround my immediate family's good will to live without haste against those who want to see us suffer life as it comes at us."

So many complaints! So many obstacles are being placed in our paths in cycles to destroy us. But almighty GOD and his son JESUS! "We know that Satan and his imps are liars." They are rebuked in the mighty names of GOD and his son JESUS.

It seems as though we got people in our lives (some ex family members on both sides) that can't stand to see us live life with love surrounded by people who really and deeply care and love us unconditionally. They can't stand that my immediate family and I hang out together all the time (travel, throw parties, socialize and have a wonderful time) together with out a hint of jealously in the mix. "I can't help if my immediate family and I have it like that!" I know that the people in our circle need to get a life and live it as abundantly and spiritually as they possibly can without worrying about what my immediate family and I are doing 24/7.  Our business is mutual and we don't have time for ignorance, spying on us, dramatic spasms, controversy, and people who don't want to be happy with themselves and live life to fullest.

"I think my mortal FATHER would've wanted his blood family to be happy while he lives in Heaven with the Angels." I can rest assure that my immediate family and I will accommodate his wishes as everyday passes in the mighty name of my pilots. Oh my GOD and your son JESUS! I pray for peace, prosperity and perseverance for my immediate family and I to live without people trying to bring haste to our lives and bring us down to their levels of ignorance, dramatic spasms, controversy and conniption fits, because they are not happy with their lives and that they don't have a life to live and enjoy with GOD and his son JESUS first in charge. No more worries about what people may think of my immediate family and I anymore.

My immediate family and I are moving on with new beginnings. GOD and his son JESUS are directing and guiding our paths of life. No more extreme blockage that clots our path of righteousness. I pray that our arteries of faith are kept clear for every step we take towards living life to the fullest, loving every moment that life brings us...laughing, smiling, praying and enjoying life continues to go on in the mighty name of GOD and his son JESUS. Move those stumbling blocks out of our paths, because I rebuke them in the mighty name of my pilots.

Jealousy in this still not an option when there is nothing to be jealous about.

Closing A Family Chapter With A Conscience

Book 59

Matthew 6:14 -15 - 14. For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:  15. But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. 

Psalms 41:7 - 7. All that hate me whisper together against me: against me do they devise my hurt.


2 Corinthians 1:4 - 4. Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of GOD. 

Mark 11:25 - 25. And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. 

Luke 6:27 - 27. But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you




My immediate family and I have decided to close the chapter of our lives with most of my father's extended family members. We still have a few we'd like to stay in contact with whenever we see them on the street, or in a store, or where ever that may be, my immediate family will never hold a grudge against those who supported us from day one before and after my father's death. Nevertheless...we will not continue to hold a grudge against those who hurt us throughout my father's illness and after his death. It's wrong and my immediate family have a conscience to do so. We will then let go what was once was, is then now, and will not remain a canker sore in our futures.

"For me personally...its better not to have anything to do with those who 'ultimately' hurt my father, my immediate family, and myself." I feel that I can more better heal the gash in my heart from the trauma of my father's death if I have no contact, or a reminder of bad memories.  My immediate family and I chose to forgive in the name of GOD and his son JESUS, but never forget the chaos, the havoc, the lies, the hurt, the indiscretions of those who choose to rushed my Father in his casket. There is nothing else either of us can do about anything but pray. My immediate family and I have given all our grief, hurt and the Hades we've been through to GOD and his son JESUS. "Vengeance is still in the hands of my pilots on those who caused us grief and pure Hades." We want touch what my pilots can do a better job than all of us can ever fathom.

My father is in the hands of GOD and his son JESUS. "In paradise!" I'm going to always be happy with knowing that. I know that its time to let go the past; live in the present, and walking into the future with a clear head and conscience. I'm so sorry this post was so short, but I need to heal and move on. Maybe...just maybe I can have a little peace.

Forever Scarred

Book 58

Acts 10:38 - 38. How GOD anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Ghost and with power: who went about doing good, and healing all that were oppressed of the devil; for GOD was with him.

1 Corinthians 12:9 - 9. To another faith by the same Spirit; to another the gifts of healing by the same Spirit.

Colossians 4:8 - 8. Whom I have sent unto you for the same purpose, that he might know your estate, and comfort your hearts.

It was better for me to forgive my ex aunt Minnie Lou for what she has put my family and myself through with her Power of Attorney over (what he says it was for my father's health and finance) it was over my father's life as I saw it along with my father's illness until his death (she was murdering him) slowly. Never forgetting my father's last words to me "She's killing me" before he slipped into a coma a day later. I have a conscience to live without regrets, knowing that I was completely there for my father through thick and thin before, during and after his death. Still...GOD has his vengeance against those who caused my immediate family grief and my ex aunt...the center of it all. "The Nucleus", of course. 

It doesn't hurt to write about my feelings and calling those out who caused my father, my family and I grief. I'm pretty much dealing with my grief in many ways. The reality of my father's death, I'm still trying to come to terms. That is a very hard thing to do! My twin sister Sherri and I finally put away our father's obituary.

We had to in order for our hearts to at lease start healing. Maybe I can say...it's time really start living. "Our father is gone to glory!" Sherri and I need to finally come to terms with our father's death. We pray for guidance, strength and comfort every single day.

The thought of everything that has happen still remains, but will always haunt my immediate family and I for the rest of our natural mortal lives. I can't help the fact I can't stop talking, or forget about deceptions black cloud that my ex aunt has pillowed over my immediate family and my head. GOD and his son JESUS is phenomenal when it comes to healing and comforting those who've have been through life's challenge and complete Hades. I will keep praying for my ex aunt and those who follow in her deception. It makes me a better person, a forgiving person in the eyes of GOD and his son JESUS.

The next chapter in my life is keeping it right with GOD and his JESUS. Keeping dark evil spirits and the ghosts away from me. Moving on with life without negatives to drag me or my immediate family down. If it takes overlooking what, who, or what was once was...then I'm fine with that. My immediate family are fine with the results.

Vengeance is still GOD and his son JESUS in the matter of my ex aunt and those who helped and participated in her fortress. My immediate family and I can still sleep good at night knowing that. GOD and his son JESUS is always...always good all the time. Rest in Heaven FATHER! Your family and I will always love you unconditionally and for infinity.

The Nucleus

Book 57

Synopsis: My post is about revealing the "center" of destruction that revolved around my immediate family and its bad memory that continues to haunt us. When I think about how my immediate family was treated by this nucleus, "I think of the book of Proverbs, the entire chapter one", I choose to continue to write about my feelings so I could be completely understood when I think about my ex. aunt and what she did to my immediate family over a year ago. I choose to not disclose her name because I don't want nothing more to do with her ever, or to know her. I'd rather not have her part of my life, because its the only way I could heal completely from my father's death. It is also the way my immediate family feel too! All though...everything was forgiven in order for my family and I to move on with life without my father in the mist of our mortal lives.  

Proverbs 1:33 - 1. The Proverbs of Solomon the son of David, King of Israel  2. To know wisdom and instruction; to perceive the words of understanding 3. To receive the instruction of wisdom, justice, and judgment, and equity 4. To give subtilty to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion. 5. A wise man will hear,m and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels. 6. To understand a proverb, and the interpretation; the words of the wise, and their dark sayings. 7. To fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction. 8. My son, hear the instruction of they father, and forsake not the law of thy mother. 9. For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head and chains about thy neck. 10. My son, if sinners entice thee, consent thou not. 11. If they say, Come with us, let us lay wait for blood, let us lurk privily for the innocent without cause. 12. Let us swallow them up alive as the grave; and whole, as those that go down into the pit. 13. We shall find all the precious substance, we shall fill our houses with spoil. 14. Cast in they lot among us; let us all have one purse. 15. My son, walk not thou in the way with them. refrain thy foot from their path. 16. For their feet run to evil, and make haste to shed blood. 17. Surely in vain the net is spread in the sight of any bird. 18. And they lay wait for their own blood; they lurk privily for their own lives. 19. So are the ways of every one that is greedy of gain; which taketh away the life of the owners thereof. 20. Wisdom crieth without; she uttereth her voice in the streets. 21. She crieth in the chief place of concourse, in the openings of the gate: in the city she uttereth her words saying. 22. How long, ye simple ones, will ye love simplicity? And the scorners delight in their scorning, and fools hate knowledge? 23. Turn you at my reproof; Behold, I will pour out my spirit unto you, I will make known my words unto you. 24. Because I have called, and ye refused; I have stretched out my hand, and no man regarded. 25. But ye have set at nought all my counsel, and would none of my reproof. 26. I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when you fear cometh. 27. When you fear cometh as desolation, and your destruction cometh as a whirlwind; when distress and anguish cometh upon you. 28.Then shall they call upon me, but I will not answer; they shall seek me early, but they shall not find me. 29. For that they hated knowledge, and did not choose the fear of the LORD. 30. They would none of my counsel: they despised all my reproof. 31. There fore shall they eat of the fruit of their own way, and be filled with their own devices. 32. For the turning away of the simple shall slay them, and the prosperity of fools shall destroy them. 33. For whoso hearkeneth unto me shall dwell, and shall safety, and shall be quiet from fear of evil. 

When I think about the nucleus, I think about a compact bundle of subatomic particles of protons electrically charged and neutrons (the neutral) that surrounds it. My immediate family are the neutrons and protons. Everyone else are the electrons electrically charged quantized in a destructive atomic atom, the 'center' point of that destruction caused by her evil presents that haunts my immediate family and I until thus day. Nothing more I could do about it now. I can't help but write about my feelings at my darkest hour. 

Its the only way I could heal old gashes. My FATHER remains constantly on my mind every single day of my life for almost seven months after his death. My twin sister and I are totally the electrically charged protons still grieving from our father death and the bad memories that comes along with it. But...vengeance is GOD and his son JESUS. I will not continue to interfere with my pilots works. Karma will continue to meet my ex aunts fate provided by GOD and his son JESUS if she continues to be the center of attention. 

As living witnesses to her fortress, I can't forget how my ex aunt put my immediate family and I and unfortunately, my father through complete Hades to prove her point. She took control of a situation that wasn't hers, or her place to control my immediate family responsibility to be the caretakers of my father's health, finance and well being. She used that "power" to her advantage to do her evil works. She did what she wanted to make my immediate family suffer during the time of my father's illness, until his death, and during his bereavement no matter what the cost of her ignorance. "It definitely cost my father his life in the process". 

It will always be personal for me and my immediate family! There is nothing; I mean nothing my ex aunt could do to fix, or change what she has done to make everything right. The damage is done forever! My immediate family and I has closed a chapter of our lives in a burnt offering of dismissal (my ex aunt) and I know one day, my old gash will heal and all is forgotten. I want to be a neutron once again...neutral as heck! 

I know I have a long way to go with the help of GOD and his son JESUS to continue to provide me and my immediate family the comfort we need to continue to heal from bad memories and to move on with life.

"Anniversary"

Book 56

1 Corinthians 5:13 - 13. But them that are without GOD judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person. 

Psalms 101:4 - 4. A froward heart shall depart from me: I will not know a wicked person

Proverbs 24:8 - 8. He that deviseth to do evil shall be called mischievous person

When I sit here everyday for 365 days, dreading the very day this awful fate my immediate family and I were faced with over "one year ago" to thus day, I find myself very angry...unbalanced...plagued with fury. The only thing I could do is to start praying for comfort, guidance and strength from GOD and his son JESUS for my hurt, my fury and my grief, and to pray for the desolate one who started all of my immediate family's grief in the first place. All has been forgiven in my heart! I couldn't go on with life if I didn't, but...I will never forget as long as I live after finding out that my father Wesley Brunson Sr. was admitted into the hospital on June 22, 2016 without his immediate family's knowledge. What makes me more angry about that day was when my immediate family and I weren't told about my father being admitted into the hospital until a week later on the 29th of June 2016.

My father could of had his family close to him during his time of need. It would of made a difference in my father life to have his immediate family there near and close to him when he was admitted to the hospital. But...Lucifer had to get in the way of everything according to my father. From that point, all Hades broke loose. Then power reigned her fury against my immediate family because there was something to gain from taking control where it didn't belong in the first place...especially since we were a "live" family present in my father's life. I choose to continue to leave this fate towards the "desolate" one who started this whole business with gaining power over a live family's patriarch to GOD and his son JESUS.

Karma is something else when there are reaping that still needs to be sown. Vengeance is still GOD and his son JESUS to fight battles that are hard to win. I know my family and I can sleep well at night knowing that we didn't do anything wrong to deserve what has happen to us over a year ago thus day. I've seen what GOD and his son JESUS can do since my father's passing six months ago. I'm not going to boast or laugh about what fate has awaited the desolate one thus far. I'm going to continue to pray for comfort, guidance, strength and to add...patience that the gash in my heart will finally heal its fresh wound.

My immediate family will some day try to get over (which I doubt) the devastation of what happened when I first found out about the "Power of Attorney my ex aunt took over my fathers life before we could get a meeting with hospital administrators, mangers and supervisors about my fathers health. In other words...my immediate family and I would still have a close family without no problems whatsoever had my ex aunt wouldn't of interfered in the first place with my fathers health and his life.